The coming together

of a permanently fragmented life. The pockets of time in reveal that one has to face to get the end in time. 

The decisiveness today on the missing tool sets ... the set of clothes where the dry cleaning used to hang ready... and in receipt of ... the  clothes of a deceased husband. A pair of worn socks before they used to rot off... The silent findings shouting to me from the echoes of time now distant past ... 

And the long windings in not having a skip or not, like with the other home ... just me and my time in slow and swift way until the planned time here of transportation and help to do the runs to the tip ... and the new home for items North ... 

The more of the planning convo in among my tert and terse sound offs about this process. 

By year end will see the list of items to look out for to others to proceed which is more than for one man really to do ... 

Bare trees

the nondescript sky, the dizziness that plaques one. The rumblings of depressive mode indeed. However designing in my better seconds seems to reinstate I still have the flair to think out the box ... 

Out of my hands

in literal and the decisions made and made and made ... 

... the continuing saga of life in transition... 

The ponder and not ...

I have finally taken a interest in a physical planner to routine up my haul remove in life  ... The ones on sale I like, too costly to worth the waste in shred, when the year is finished ... the refills just as costly ... 

My wonky world in that much ... 

With all this abundance around me ... I put to use my design hat, I duly printed my own version in much in there is in this world. 

The template ... the colour density in some pages for writing over ...

The speed in using a combination of the the tools available to me, other than the elongated. The template flipped to do the other days of the week. I then customised to add symbols already in printed, to not faff about ...the baking time I tend to do midweek. The allocated paperwork dispersal of hubby paperwork ... The sift back in order that brings the grrr in me ...

The customised ...

The custom page divided in morning afternoon and evening ... I tend to work through the home weekends. I allocated Monday for rest out time ... And a definite homemade meal Wednesday. I made Cornish Pasties this week. A vegetarian version. The variates for each month. The date put in when I plan? I have will have sections to  put in the plans to redesign my life through.

• Finances 
• Paperwork back in order 
• Vocational  
• Home management 
• Solutions to shift ... 
• The info needed for when I die ... a wish to collate items to ease the burden on those to deal 

There are tracker charts for everything and more 

• Mood 
• Diet 
• Weight
• Water 
• Meals 
• Budget 
• Cleaning 
• Bills 
• Social media time 
• Debt 
• Savings 
• Bucket list 
• Reading list
• Goals 
• Aims 
• Reflection 
• Well being 
• Mindfulness 
• Activity 
• Steps 
• Doodles 
• Art 
• Colour mood 

Now whether I continue to use it?

My sister set me out too with a Project Mojo planner... now is the time to bring that into function!

At least another career prospect ... a graphic design degree? I require more technical skills to mass produce !!!! 

  

The bore out the door

the perpetual...transition...

I will be back in the kitchen next week organising the find in way of cooking a bit better. The keep track and rotation of stock is more frugal with my new life style. The way forward in cooking and eating nutritionally. Once an array of spices and herbs and many baking items. I have reduced it down to the most oft and useful in multi functional ....

My aim once I was left alone again ... 

More relief on the

home recently. The disperse here there and everywhere. The tussles with either a big hauls and or diligent in doing very much a quandary ... 

There will be a point after kiddy been to relieve a bit where I will get someone to assist ... 

Thy celebration of

a life this weekend ... awaiting the roast to finish cooking .... a meal I promised myself many this January.... a twist on the festive meals I was not here for in the December... I have had varying seasonal aromas in November and this month instead. 

And today the poignant reminder my other half not here to share the abundance of good food and drink here this time ... 

The next phase

In my space, my time will lead to chipping away some more, while I work out beside charity coming and collecting the items .. 

This year sees more gumption in dealing with others to assist ...

Once kiddy comes in the spring too; I will see more what is left and decide on 

For now and tonight I am making another area more pleasing on the eye ... a room where one relaxes and sleep ... 

A chitty chat

and a banter with me family again. The progress up date on all aspects. The health. The home. My thoughts. Where I will be next year. And the all inmprtant now and future. The giving of my time, that is in due process. The forms signed. The references done. The DBS now dispatched ... 

I am tickled with this, as much as I am in dealing with the long haul. And the treat of all that December gave in time with so many too. 

Quandaries in that

quell ...a journey taken in all directions ... the chosen few to follow and not wander off task ... 

Task in hand

today was remembering where I had put all those silly certificates, that I not had with me for the informal interview last year. The first aid and defibrillator, the IT, the introduction to health and social care etc ... 

I had my recent acquired exam certificates and a few other bits. 

It tas been a day of bringing together more of the recent acquisitions to my volunteer portfolio to add to the current, for the future vocation selection ... 

I am knee deep in the post crisis accumulating tasks I banged on about in not handling my own scars in that bombardment of post time, added with unnecessarily junk mail handling that I now have a tad more of a system with ... the continuing deaths of key family members in the very middle of so much grief. And shoving it to one side in the rush of hospital bedside visits at key points of coma etc ... 

The not just spouse bereavement 

The loss of key elements of a fundamental organised functional life grief anf much more ... The loss of not just self, not quite got at times ...

A place to sleep. A place to wash and toilet needs. A place for clothes to dress in. A place to work in preparing food. A place to eat. A place to sit to eat. A place to sit and play. A place to sit and work. A place to just chill and relax ... and on it goes 

The coats and shoes in the right place to pick up and go out ...

And the keys and all life bits and pieces 

The storage of time; lost in the whispers ... 

the quandaries

In the kitchen with the shopping, though the proper use of space brings dividends in this room. It is a battle zone. The ultimate price of discarding everyday for the past at times is very irksome. The days where the shopping is scattered messy more than others. The attempt to enjoy the bake and cook that used to be easy with everything at hand! 

The focus

on how pleasing to return back home to what I had achieved last year now. The space created. Now I want more of it back in functions ... 

The groans still many on the functions to put my even undies somewhere after having a usual room to me at Mums ... and in the kitchen the fine tuning in getting to the areas to get rid of the mountain of paperwork in that area lurking in irksome ... to put my larder pantry back how I use it  ....then ready to move ... 

The logistics that others do not recognise ... yes I would like to get back to the county I grew in ... but first enjoy a freely running home into how it suits me ... first .... 

Everything in

Oblivion ... it tis another surreal day in clambering among the distaste in this home. Thee removal of more unwarranted goodies. The sheer waste of so much haunts those deathly thoughts. 

The mystical interaction with this consistently difficult quandaries. The time to refresh, recharge and restart avpchieved  ... 

Back in mode to dig away at the state left to deal with started in earnest again today ... 

Implementing ideas

in slow fruition... 

A wardrobe used elsewhere ... 

to most ... does not mean anything... to me  a breathe of fresh air in .... space! 

A bracing walk ...

.. around the clutter of life ... 

Cluuuter of Xmas decs for charity collecting ...